Day 3 – What are your values and are you being true to them?

This question is really over a dozen questions once you break down the different areas and started an avalanche of sorts of multiple thought streams that I need to rein in. There were several categories from spiritual to work to friends but I’ll go with family and try to keep it under 500 words!

The article states that when we don’t act congruently with what we value, symptoms of discomfort arise. I’d have to agree with that so let’s hope we are heading into a comfortable self-analysis because I don’t drink so if this blogging experiment goes all wrong there’s no numbing the pain.

What are my values and am I being true to them?

We’ll start with a list and work in the ‘am I being true to it’ answers to keep it neat.

Family Rules

Family

1. Responsibility – This is near to the core of my existence. So much so that I’m convinced that if it were not for the birth of my son there is little hope that I would have made it past my 21st birthday. I had a strong sense of responsibility towards my family, in the face of overwhelming apathy as long as I could remember. I couldn’t stand my mom or my brothers at different intervals of adolescents but if you said something even remotely critical about them I’d likely try to pull your tongue out. So while I was loyal to these one sided relationships, they gave me nothing in return. But when I first held my son, and each of my babies since, the responsibility to love, care for, protect and raise them became my reason for being. In this I have never wavered or slacked and I have been true to this my whole life.

2. Love above all things – when I think of family, outside of my own children, I’d have to say that it is very over-rated. Being tied to and responsible for all these people who don’t care about you; that is my experience of family so everything else I see on television or read in book and especially the smiley “yeah for family” stuff posted on Facebook always seemed very make-believe to me. I can see how you could have it with the family you pick (husband and kids) but not with the one you are born to. Given that this was my reality, I feel like I am still very true to this value as I still love (verb love) them all the best I can. If they hurt, then I hurt because I love them, outside of all the BS, and above all else.

3. Faith in God – There are a set of morals that I feel are necessary for you to be a good person and live a fulfilled life that honors the gift of your existence and those morals are conveniently listed in my religion. There is a lot of extra stuff in there also but I try to not let that distract me from the fact that there is a God. You don’t have to believe in him for that statement to be true but my life is enhanced when I acknowledge him. My families faith in God means to me that we are all working from the same set of rules and expectations and I find great security in that and nurture it in my husband and children staying true to this value.

I’m feeling a little like after written finals in high school where you are pretty sure you answered the questions correctly but you could be totally off and jacking up your grade. But this is worse because I’ll never get a grade so I’ll never know! I’ll just say it’s enough that I’m four days into my self-imposed blog challenge and I have three post so just on participation points I’m pulling a good A- or B+ and I’m happy with that.

650 words… 150 words over my promise… geez… okay… B-

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