Day 2 – Why don’t you do things you know you should be doing?

Ooooh… this one will be EASY!

Why don’t I do things I know I should be doing?

First, I’m stubborn as the day is long. If there was a donkey in the zodiac I would have been born under that sign. If you asked any of my friends and family if I was a little stubborn even the most loving and polite would repeatedly nod yes, very hard, and correct the question by putting “very” in front of stubborn. So stuck in my ways that sometimes I don’t do something just to spite myself.

Second, plain old fear. Fear of failure. Fear of using up all my options. Fear of being wrong about what I believe I should be doing.

I would definitely list on my personal flaws board “not doing what I should be doing”. These to do’s usually solely apply to things I should be doing for myself; continuing my education, taking a break and getting a message, doing my writing before doing the laundry, etc. But unfortunately sometimes it affects other people like me stalling for almost a year now on teaching my daughter Spanish, because first I would need to learn Spanish. It’s a pretty unattractive trait. Kind of an Anti-Life Skill really.

If I mind mapped it (which is something I rarely do but people keep talking about) I’d probably be pretty disgusted with the bubbles floating out from this question. Stubborn and Fear sure do sound a whole hell of a lot better than Lazy, Self-Defeating or Don’t Know What the Heck I’m Doing! Maybe they all apply but in the pursuit of defending my life choices I’m going to stick with the first two and make sure to keep my eyes open for the rest.

Wish I could say that this question made me re-think how I do things and while it has made me take a look at what I’m not doing that I should be doing – I’m probably still not going to learn Spanish tomorrow.



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